Not at all. There’s a whole generation of people that are very, very skinny; it’s not a question of size, but whether it’s at their genetic level or something else that’s been instilled in them. Some people might actually have the ability to gain weight, to gain fat and lose it, but not necessarily at a level that’s healthy. I don’t even know if that’s ever something that is ever good for you and how I relate to that.
How does it feel to lose fat? Have you been able to lose a lot of fat?
Absolutely. I’ve always had the lean gene. A lot of people are saying my body looks really weird when I walk around. I know a lot of people who have had gastric bypass surgeries, and who have had their stomachs slimmed down and the shape of their stomachs have changed. I’ve lost 10 pounds since I started, and even though I’m not able to have the shape I desire today, I don’t have to be skinny to do that. I don’t have an excuse or desire to be skinny.
Do you feel better about yourself because you’ve had that surgery?
I do. The only thing that could make me more comfortable with myself is being thin. But I’m also more comfortable with my body because it’s my own body, and I can live with it and let it live with me, and that means being happy with who I am.
What are some of the different types of exercises you do?
I go to some really good gyms that have really, really good people. You know, I walk into a gym and I feel like I’m not at a gym anymore; I feel like I’m a person in a room with other people. I feel like I’m there with those people and I’m not alone with anything and I’m able to communicate with them and share everything I think about. It makes me feel like there’s actually somebody who’s with me who understands who I am — or was, anyway — and that’s so liberating for me.
What kind of music do you listen to?
I listen to a lot of indie stuff. I listen to a lot of indie stuff that doesn’t have any of that fat-shaming thing, so that’s what gets me. I don’t really listen to any more ’80s music because it just makes me feel really dumb and gross and I feel like a horrible person for being
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