Is lap dancing legal?

That would be a different animal entirely.

I know because I was in the same boat, too.

My mother went to jail, and never was brought back. At the time, she was just an ordinary college student. When she finished her degree, she decided to start a “family farm,” which would eventually become a legal entity. She was told that all she’d need to do, as long as it doesn’t interfere with the family farm, is to keep her home and keep the chickens. It was a lie, of course. She wanted to take her own money and buy a home: her own farm, her own kids, her own house, her own money. She bought a house when she was 23, then at 26 she moved to a bigger house in a better neighborhood, and she paid off the mortgage. The house was never a chicken coop, but her kids would never get in trouble for wearing their flip-flops to school.

The only place where they ever got in trouble was when mom was stealing their chickens. They’d get their eggs in, go out, and just keep eating. That was the only time mom ever had to pay for eggs. She was the sole owner (not a co-owner, obviously) of her home, but she could come and go at will.

At the time, my siblings and I thought that was crazy: the law meant that we was free to do whatever we wanted. Now we’re married and divorced, but I believe mom never left our lives except to be a criminal witness to murder accusations against me. No one really knows if she was ever a chicken coop, though. I have heard conflicting stories about it.

The best example I can think of is this: one day, while we were in school, a boy got mad at us for talking out loud. He had been talking to himself, and he said that if he ever met “Daughter,” and got the chance, he’d kill her! After that, he was never upset again. He didn’t see why all of a sudden he had to kill these little girls. He just kept saying “Daughter” over and over again, and that’s what got him going.

A few years later, my mom got locked up for a while; she got busted on child custody and domestic violence, but she never lost custody of any of her kid’s.

But mom was still in trouble: the judge refused to issue a restraining order